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Choosing the right man

On a daily basis, we are approached by single women who’re looking for tips to look out for in men they wish to settle with in a lifelong commitment. Many of those women are already dating, but need coaching in order to be certain of the kinds of men they’re with.

The other bulk of women that approach us on a daily basis are already married, but have serious challenges in their marriages. On examining most of these marital challenges, it’s not hard to pick up a pattern of mistakes they made in choosing the kind of men they’re now stuck with.

A lot of agony in many marriages we come across today could be avoided just by making the right choice before the wedding.

Based on our daily lived experiences as relationship coaches, we’ve compiled the following characteristics of what we believe should form a significant part of what makes a great husband.

He Provides
He always puts family first. He’s a selfless man, who lives to please those he cares most about. He’s the kind of man who can work two jobs with no fuss, always has a side-hustle in mind to earn more money, and guards his savings with his life. He can’t rest until he knows the ones he loves are okay. Work-life balance is very important to him, but if missing time with his loved ones means a better life for them, he’s always game to put in the overtime and take one for the team.

Why He Makes a Good Husband: A hopeless man is a helpless man. His lack of vision and inactivity will drain your marriage to perpetual financial drought.

He’s Solid
At your weakest moments, his strength keeps you stable and inspires you to push through. He isn’t immune to pain or frustration, but he does handle it well, and he knows how to pull himself out of low places. He doesn’t easily panic. His stable posture and demeanour brings a sense of calm and security. He’s the kind of man who never misses your call when he knows you need to get something off your chest, or better, just a friend to be there for you. Speaking of chests, his is always there for you to lean on, squeeze, and find comfort in when it feels like only a hug will do.

Why He Makes a Good Husband: He’s loyal, devoted, and a true pillar in the world of the
woman he loves.

He’s Problem Solver
He’s a quick, solid thinker who hates to be backed into a corner. He doesn’t just see the problem in front of him, he sees a road map of the many solutions available to him and takes his time as he determines the best way to get there. He is patient, because he has to be. Rushing things is rarely the answer and he knows this. He’s diligent, rational, analytic, focused and diagnostic, and isn’t easily threatened by pressure. Why He Makes a Good Husband: Happier times in marriage aren’t always just around the corner, and getting past the bumps on the road requires a detailed plan and smart thinking.

He’s a Believer
When the world around him comes crumbling down and the sun seems never rising, this man still believes. His faith is his foundation. It gets him through the good and the bad, and it never falters. He believes in the things unseen and maintains his integrity and moral virtue even at the darkest hour. His engine is always refuelled because of his regular fellowship with fellow believers, and his prayer life is his strong spiritual mainstay. His moral compass is always turned in a positive direction, and he refuses to accept failure. He helps others and chooses to live his life in a way he believes others should live theirs.

Why He Makes a Good Husband: This man has the emotional tools needed in his toolbox to repair many of the cracks and dents that will inevitably appear in any marriage. He’s a fighter, and will fight for his marriage. He won’t give up, even when you’re tempted to.

He’s Adventurous
Spending time with this man never gets tired. He believes that life is about living and is therefore not easily affected by stress and worry. It’s not that he doesn’t feel those emotions, he just refuses to let them consume him. He stays positive and seeks to enjoy all aspects of his life, as much as humanly possible. He has most likely chosen a career he loves over one that pays all the bills. Therefore he’s just as passionate about his work as he can be about feeding his cravings for new adventures. He enjoys traveling and most likely has a bucket list at least a quarter complete. He doesn’t believe in wasting time worrying about what can’t happen and prefers to shift his focus to what can. With him, there’s never a dull moment at home, in the bedroom, or when you’re out and about. His inner light shines through and warms the hearts of those around him. He keeps life exciting, almost as if, each day he presses the refresh button.

Why He Makes a Good Husband: Marrying this man ensures that one pitfall your marriage won’t ever fall into is that of pure and utter boredom. It sounds simple, but it’s so important.

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